Real Life: Take 1

Some of you may have noticed that my blog has a new title (ok, let's face it, only my Mom notices these things). With this new title comes a new chapter in my life--the first I can remember not being a student. One of my previous posts while in Chile was titled "All This, Every Day," a phrase stolen from a poem in an Anne Lamott book. This title, like most things in my life, was given to me, and the title itself reflects recognition of abundance.

My entire adult life (albeit short) has thus far centered on abundance, on realization of how deeply blessed I am. I hope it doesn't sound trite; I genuinely seem to be stuck on this thought. I have two weeks left until my graduation from college. COLLEGE. I thought I would be so much more mature by the time I got to this point, but that is neither here nor there. While my school-hating peers count down the days, I count with them. But my counting is heavy, sometimes full of dread and fear.

I am with Meg Ryan's character in "You've Got Mail" on this one: I love the smell of a freshly sharpened bouquet of pencils. I love new folders and notebooks; I love the promise of a clean slate and a new semester. I love that in school my job is to investigate, to sit and listen and soak up this intriguing and complex world of ours.

So although I am mourning the end of my formal education and of the comfort and security of school, I embark (like many of my peers) scared but hopeful. Scared because for the past 16 years I have been doing a job I was good at, and I am starting one that I might not do as well or enjoy as much as I did school. Hopeful because I am now totally adrift, free to do pretty much whatever I want! (As long as it's free.)

My blog is titled "All This, Every Day," as a reminder that we have been truly gifted. Is thankfulness a spiritual gift? I don't think so, but if it were I would want to have that one. Gratitude is praising God for what we have been given, but tonight what I'm grateful for is gratitude itself. The gift of gratitude fills my routine with breath and peace, as if God's hand is resting open on my chest, slowing my caffinated heartbeat and saying to me, "Be still. Look around you."

I travel a lot, which despite its perks often means I meet a lot of people, love a lot of people, and leave a lot of people. It is so hard to miss a place, and to miss the people of that place. I miss Chile deeply and desperately, sometimes my breath gets fast and I feel like I'm suffocating with longing to go back. In many ways, this "missing" was the theme of my semester. I miss the view of the Andes out my front door and the familiar route to class. But when my heart starts racing and the "jungle drums start beating" (Anne Lamott again), I come back to gratitude, and rest in the image of a very large God making his hand small enough to fit right over my heart. I imagine him slowing my pace to his pace, making my hearbeats calm and steady, hopeful and expectant.

...This blog got mushier than I expected.

So here is the next chapter: on January 19, I am moving to Puerto Vallarta, Mexico for 6 months. By the grace of God, I somehow have a post-grad plan (SERIOUSLY: GRACE). I have an internship with a company by the name of PEACE. PEACE is a NGO founded by an American about 10 years ago, and they have recently started a microfinance branch of their organization. For those of you who might not be familiar with microfinance, it is a poverty-alleviation strategy that provides small loans for clients looking to expand a business they've started. Usually these loans help make businesses profitable, and can be instrumental in the economic development both of families and of cities. (Most of the clients are women who did not finish high school.) I am SO excited to be a part of this!

Again I ask for your prayers, especially for safety, since Mexico's government has been a little...shall we say...unstable as of late. I'm hoping to keep updating the blog with my experiences, both exciting and frustrating. But for now, I've got two last research papers to write and my last two final exams to study for. Maybe I'm not so into school after all...